Saturday, January 5, 2019

New Year, New Beginning, New Thoughts

I have had a desire to write more since the new year has begun. I feel a need to touch the keys and produce words that can connect with my thoughts.

There have been days that I have thought about my parents to the point I wonder if they are still living. In my heart they are. They are still a part of my life. They are still apart of who I am.

I think about my dad who worked hard to provide for our family. He might not of been able to make enough to give the material items in life my friends had, but he was able to make me smile and feel loved. I can still picture him walking in the front door after a long day of working on typewriters. How he would have to carry them from one school to another. I can still see him skating around the ice rink with a smile that spread from one ear to the other. His dimples came in full force when he did. He was truly a delightful man. Oh, how I miss him.

Then, there is my mother. A lady who carried more weight that I think she ever dreamed of. She lugged not only weight, but pain that was deeper than any ocean. She carried rejection, sorrow, guilt and lack of confidence. One thing she did not lack was giving love to others. She tried to share her love that she kept captured in her heart. One way she shared her love was by sending birthday cards to everyone. Oh how I miss her and Dad calling me on the phone and singing Happy Birthday. The days of ever sharing my thoughts and trials with her have vanished the minute she took her last breath. 

I see my children's generation, not needing the connection with their parents like I needed with mine. I wonder if they feel the need to call, visit or spend time hearing stories about their past, parents or grandparents. I think instead they are focused on other things that to me have no value of importance. I'm not into the games that are on phones, computers or social media. Actually I have stopped spending time on  Facebook and since then, I have felt a weight off of my shoulders.

The weight is the negativity, degrading comments and wonder why I have spent my valuable time looking at someone else's life when I should be focusing on mine and my families. I should be taking that precious time and working on my book, working on building relationships with my children, husband, brothers and other family members.

Well, Happy New Year, and remember life is short so take the time to let your children and parents know you love them.

My prayer is you who ever your are that is reading this has a blessed year filled with priceless memories.

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